I visit CapeTalk every week to discuss some of the highlights from the news. I go into the very serious environment, and provide a much needed lighter take on what has happened in Cape Town. If you’re unable to catch the feature live, I am going to be providing for you. From this week on I will post the scripts as blog posts with a link to the clip on YouTube every week. So without further ado, here is this weeks comedy wrap up:
South Africa pipped Spain to become the world’s largest citrus exporter this week
According to Citrus Growers Association CEO Dr Boitshoko Ntshabele, South Africa overtook Spain as the world’s largest citrus exporter by volume. So when life gives anyone lemons just know it was sent by South Africa, the world is starting to know us by our Oranges and not our Oranje.
South Africa citrus farmers are not only growers, they’re also show-ers. Which is I think is why they have appeal…
The collaboration between government, transnet, and South African farmers is really paying off. One might say they are seeing the fruits of their labour. Not to rain on anyone’s parade, this new title could be under pressure due to logistical challenges and the recent severe weather conditions.
Spain actually produces in total more citrus but their export volume is lower because unlike South African farmers they actually believe in allowing their own people to eat their first fruits.
Cause why am I getting the mutt of the harvest when I buy a Mandarin?
Cashless taxi payments planned in Cape Town
The fourth industrial revolution has officially hit the Cape Town taxi industry. There are plans to start using payment cards that will be scanned when entering a taxi, and they plan to install cameras in the taxis to improve security and accountability.
Paying for a taxi ride with anything other than a scrumpled up R20 or pile of coins feels wrong though. Is R20 enough for a taxi trip anymore? I remember when the rate went from R10 for a certain distance to R12, which caused a bit of chaos for passengers.
On the camera issue, there really does seem to be an odd push for surveillance in Cape Town, a few weeks ago wasn’t there a push for drones to be used to improve security in the city. Guys, we don’t need cameras everywhere.
I do like the cashless move. You might not believe me, but I used to rely on taxis, I’m one of the few white guys I know that this is true for. But there are days where I wish I could just take a taxi to get somewhere but I don’t have cash on me.
Now when I’m walking on Main road, and someone shouts “WYNBERG” at me, I might actually just take the impromptu trip. Although with the petrol price, and the fees to cover the cameras and yocos I’m sure how affordable taxis are going to be.
South Africa Learners drivers arrests
We used to be a country, Lester. We used to be able to study four learners tests word for word, and just memorise that to pass our learners or we used to be able to drive with no learners license but a big L sticker on the back of the car and no questions would be asked.
Now, the Transport department wants to arrest people who obtained their learners licenses in questionable ways. What if you’re like me and you test badly?
The push for arrests is in line with anti-corruption measures, but surely the people who help learners get their learners licenses should be charged. Shouldn’t be like how drug dealers are more likely to get arrested than drug users.
One of the methods being used to help people is the laser pointer method, where the examiner points a laser at the correct answers. That’s the same method I use to entertain my cats. So the examiners are saying if you can’t pass your learners, you’re as dumb as a cat. I’m not saying that though.
Cape Town Marathon
This weekend we have the Cape Town Marathon, after it got blown away last year we hope it doesn’t get rained away this year.
For those running, I want to say good luck, I hope the race goes ahead. For those of us not running, get ready for every second road to be closed. I really need the roads to be closed with purpose.
It’s not a question of which roads will be closed on Sunday, it’s a question of which roads won’t be closed. At least we’ll save petrol while we’re trapped inside the city.
I’m just joking, on a more serious note, what are Cape Town people running away from? I know this is the big one when it comes to marathons, but it feels like there is a run every second week in the city. What problems are we avoiding?
Here’s the full segment incase you missed it:
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